Category: Uncategorized
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Repost: Acts of Humanity
Originally posted on My OBT: Andrew Vaughan/Canadian Press 9/11/17: It’s September 11th, and I’m never sure how to acknowledge the day. It meant – and means – a great deal to me, but I know no one wants to hear the same stories year after year. So I struggle to find things every year that…
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Happy Place
As long as I can remember whenever I have found myself surrounded by trees and can no longer see the outside world I feel a sense of magic and tranquility. There is a local park that gets me very close to this happy place. I try to get there frequently–sometimes with the dog–sometimes not. There…
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The Angry Phase
They say anger is one of the stages of grief. I thought this had passed me by–but perhaps not. I know my mother definitely had a lot of misguided anger after my father passed away. My mom definitely wasn’t shy about dumping her anger on her kids. I’ve tried to be much more cautious about…
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A Changing World
Yesterday I took a nap. When I woke up the Supreme Court had overturned Roe vs. Wade. When one becomes a parent you hope the world you bring your children in is becoming a better place. You don’t imagine something like 9/11 will happen. You don’t imagine Roe vs. Wade being overturned. I’m the mother…
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Peeling Back The Layers
I’ve noticed when someone loses their significant other, you often see new layers to the person you had not noticed before. In the case of my mother, it changed how I understood her and our relationship together. Sometimes the changes are easy to notice. A person that never wore tie dye starts including tie dye…
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The Widows Club
Widowers are included in the club as well. I’m in my fifties, and I tend to know more women than men who are close to my age that I count as part of the widows club. No one wants to be in the widows club, of course. If you are closer to 80 though, it…
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Good Intentions
I started this blog with the intent of regularly posting but somehow lost my way. Today is a beautiful spring day. The last time I blogged it was still winter–the time of year I struggle with my mood–and the time that I will now always associate with my husband’s last days. Getting to spring means…
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Problem Solving
Becoming a widow brought a new batch of problems into my life. The obvious problem of grief. Figuring out to sort through all the red tape that happens with someone’s death—still trying to figure some of that out. I often trusted my husband to know what the wisest, most cost effective thing to do when…
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In Lieu of Flowers
We have all been to a funeral or two if we have been on the planet for several decades. It is one thing to attend a funeral—another thing to be on the other side as the spouse of the person who has just died. Going through the process I had a million thoughts–some I wish…
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Comfort Zone Revisited–Being a Widow
In bloganuary one of the prompts was writing about getting out of your comfort zone. I wrote about how becoming a widow forced me to get out of my comfort zone. There is a flip side to this. I think there are times I mention something related to becoming a widow I make people uncomfortable.…
The Widow's Fables 